47 weeks to go

Hmm.  Back at work last week = very tired = too tired to write blog.

It was tough being back at work.  There are so many steps in the building and I was just so tired.  Being up at 8pm is a luxury at the moment as I am normally tucked up in bed and drifting off. 

I finally abandoned the crutches just over a week ago.  It was a lack of confidence making me keep them, but I can walk without them.  I found myself limping for the first few days, but a physio visit soon sorted that out.  I can do up stairs properly, but down I can't do yet without landing heavily. 

One thing that I have found is that I can actually put my heel down when I am walking.  It is amazing that I can do this without even having to think about it after so many years of walking on my toes and not being able to force my heel down even when told I must.  I wonder if my running style will be different when I am finally allowed to start running again.  Will I still be able to run on my toes?

Physio has been great.  I have had my muscles loosened and loads of exercises to do.  I have to start to build my glutes and calfs back up again now.  I am trying desperately to get my balance right because I have no balance on my right leg.  This lack of balance is still causing me to land heavily on my left leg.  My achilles is very sore at the moment. 

My mood has slipped with not being able to exercise.  I walked to the shop today rather than get the bus just so I could do some exercise because I felt quite down.  Still, only two weeks to go until I can hopefully get going again - although it may be longer because my knee still hurts :( 

Apart from work, there hasn't been time for much.  The PECO BBQ was great fun and it was nice to spend time with my running friends.  I am still getting to parkrun every Saturday morning to cheer people on.  It keeps me at least a little bit involved and allows me to see people.

Right, it's 6:20 so it's almost bed time now - night night!

49 weeks to go

Tough week this week.

Tried using no crutches at home.  Fine apart from stairs.  I tried to go up and down them on my own, but it hurt.

I have been really feeling it not being able to run and in considerable pain on occasions probably due to trying to do too much.  Wednesday I found myself in tears on and off throughout the day and was desperate for my endorphin fix.  Kept having to remind myself that this small amount of time was nothing in comparison with the amount of time it would let me run afterwards.

Thursday I started to panic that it hadn't worked.  My knee was clicking and sticking and also hurting when I tried to do some of the exercises.

Friday was physio day.  I got told off for using two crutches and am only allowed one when outside.  I can walk without them, it's just a complete lack of confidence.  I was walking very stiff legged at the beginning of my session, but she soon sorted that out.  I have more exercises to do including balancing on one leg (which I am still useless at!) and side stepping.  I also have to do the heel rolls exercise which is really hard for me to do when I can't put my heel down.  This is, surprisingly, easier now since the op.  My knee is clicking because my muscles have turned to mush and not keeping it in line to track properly.  I am walking better and can manage stairs providing I put both feet on each step, but it is so tiring.

Sunday was Leeds Half.  Loads of run club members running and marshalling.  Little K did the junior race and did FAB.  She finished the 2.5km in 11:01 minutes which is brilliant!  After, we went to a wonderful marathon party celebration.  I love my running family!  I am now very very tired and although I haven't done much today, it has completely worn me out...

50 weeks to go.

This week has been about getting my leg moving and accepting a few horrible things.

• On advice from T, it is looking like racing is out for this year.  GNR is the only one I have entered - shame it is the most expensive! 
• I cannot do as much as I want to be able to do because I end up with a very sore leg and sleeping about a million hours if I do try to do a few things. 
• A 10 minute walk currently takes me 30 minutes.

I have been at home this week.  I have forced myself to make use of my time and write some reports which will free up a bit of time at a later date.  I have also made sure that I have done my exercises 3 or 4 times each day. 

Wednesday was one week down the line and I tried to start to use just one crutch.  I managed okay until I went out for a coffee with AL in the afternoon and despite having my foot up in the cafe, still needed two crutches to hobble around Asda because my leg hurt so much.  It's soooo frustrating.

Thursday I decided to do a few bits to the club website and set up our new domain.  Caught up with points for the championship as well.

Friday I went to physio and was pleased that she was pleased with how my leg was mending.  I had a better range of motion than she thought I would have.  I can walk easily using two crutches without putting much weight on them, but go down to one crutch and I am limping.  Very strange!  Later walked to get K from Brownies and a 10 minute walk took me 30 mins.  Hmmm.

Saturday it was lovely because H came and picked us up and took us to parkrun.  Great to see everyone again.  Took some photos on my new camera and tested out the zoom which was great.  Took K to the new swimming pool and she liked it.  It will be the first club run from there on Tuesday.  It will be interesting to see how many people stay with us. 

After going to the pool, K and I went into town and despite a broken walk of 5 minutes, I was exhausted and in agony by the time we got home.  Leg up for the rest of the day.

So I now have 50 weeks to go and hopefully will be able to start some exercise in 4 to 6 weeks.  Must keep going with rehabilitation exercises if I am going to stand any chance of this.

(still looking a bit manky!)